13 Reasons Why
I just finished 13 Reasons Why by Jay Asher. Actually It was my second time reading it. For those of you who don’t know what the story is about it is about a boy who receives cassette tapes from an unknown person. When he listens to them he finds out they were made by a girl from his school who committed suicide. She has them being mailed to everyone who is mentioned on the tapes. She describes her life or her reasons as a snowball effect. How one action leads to another.
Now you might be wondering why I decided to read a very depressing book twice. Well the first time I read it I was in a deep depression. The only books I would read are about depression, self harming, and suicide. Now I am okay. I still have my bad days, but I can handle them now with out self harming. I wanted to see this time if I would have the same reaction.
For the most part I did. It scared me just as it did before. I have felt the same way the girl did in the book. Like every time I am let up for air some one pushes me back under the water. I had my own snowball effect. I had my own out burst were I just wanted someone to know what was going on. To ask me if I was okay and realize I wasn’t.
There was one thing I didn’t realize the first time. That this book made me really consider suicide. I went back and read my old journal from the first time I read this. It talks about about how I want it all to go away. I want to be left alone. I was just done with people and life. I have always said I would never commit suicide because I was scared of death.
That is true. If anyone talks about death I started to have a panic attack. But when I was severely depressed my fears no longer mattered. All I wanted was for the pain to end. Too bad like the girl no one noticed. Everyone including my friends thought I was holding it all together. No one saw the signs or my cries for help.
Why does this matter. Clearly I am fine now. I made it through the darks times. Yes I did. Not everyone does though. Suicide rates for teenagers is rising. Parents. Teachers. Friends. People. Need to notice. The problem is we think well someone else will help them. If you think that then other people do too. And that person who is crying out gets pushed along until they have no strength to told on any longer.
We need to be more aware. We need to take action. No one deserves to feel like no one cares. That they are alone in this world. So take the time to help someone if you notice their cries. One person can make a difference. They could end the snowball effect.